Recoil. Withdraw. Repeat.

Ever elusive, all too reclusive -- like a distant star fading fast.

I let you in, to let you go -- like an ephemeral moment, I won't last.

I don't feel it in my heart, I feel it in my head.

I don't feel feelings of love, just hurt instead.

Drink me in, I'll pour you out.

Taste my skin, I'll quench your doubt.

Fill me up... and I'll nourish you.

Act like you mean it, while I'll only pretend to.

Audrey Kawasaki - Carry On - Oil & Graphite on Wood

Bleeding Heart

and you say:
let's forget about it, and just carry on.
until the situation resurfaces, unresolved.

and you say:
you care, but you're insecure - I need to change.
If I change, then don't you care that I won't be the same?

and you say:
You're happy, but then constantly complain.
if you're so happy, then why would you need me to change?

and you say:
how you wish time would stop just like this.

then remind me of the days before me when you felt much more bliss.

your contradictions are consuming me.
your empty promises are numbing me.
your thoughtless actions are diffusing me.

And there you go, gallivanting about your day.
I'm here, you're there - words spoken - but nothing consequential to say.
And there you go, pretending everything is perfectly okay.
I'm here, you're there - glance averted - everything's in such disarray.


I pulled out my heart for you - and you were supposed to take care of it.
I wish there was more I could do - instead of forcing you to cherish it.

I pulled out my heart for you-- Only for you to tear it apart.
I wish there was a magic button; - Rewind ? Erase ? Back to Start???

I didn't think it was possible to feel my heart bleed.
And I don't know how you don't hear me - crying for you in need.


Image: Audrey Kawasaki's My Dishonest Heart